Oh! What a gay day.

I should stop say that now, for words that I used a few decades ago may have changed their definition, so it can all get a bit confusing.

Do you remember the days if you said that you were Gay,

It meant with joy you would leap and shout,

When a fairy was enchanting and dressing up and camping,

Was something we did with the Scouts,

Oh those carefree days when an urgent case of AID,

Was something we sent to the Sahara,

A fruit was something nice to eat,

A poof something for your feet,

And a queen, some old tart in a tiara.

However, it has been a stotter of a day, I set off just after 9 O’clock, once the traffic had calmed down. With no clear destination in mind, and on the clear understanding that if you do not know where you are going, all roads lead you there, I pressed on into Dairsie. Wham, I was struck in the lip by a large flying object, possibly a bee, boy did it hurt, leaving me with a fat lip to prove it.

I had been perusing, the OS map the other day looking for little second class roads that I have not been down before. I found one that went down the side of Dairsie School let’s try that today. The road soon led me onto a farm track, steep with a loose surface, so much for following the OS map. After the farm the road, if you can call it that, petered out and became a grassy lane, the track just about visible. With grass now the height of my handlebars, I trundled on. The lane ended at a farmer’s newly cut hayfield, and by the time I reach that gate, my feet and trouser legs, all the way up to my bum, were wet through, (help ma boab, folks will think I’ve peed m’sel’.)

What to do now? I saw a farm about a mile away across three fields, there must be a road beyond the farm, so I set out first across the newly cut grass, then newly harvested barley, and finally another grass field, and there it was a road covered in lovely tar Macadam, O’ joy of joys. I had not gone far when I found my gears would not index, stopping to check the chain and gears had been trying hard to impersonate a grass cutting machine, ho-hum.

(checking the map when I returned home I now see where I went wrong and the path I cycled today was simply that a footpath.)

The road took me into Logie then Kilmany where I joined the A92 the main road from Dundee to Edinburgh. To get off the main road I turned off at Rathillet for Cupar. I did not fancy going all the way into Cupar and home on the A91 so when I saw the sign ‘Leuchars 10 miles’ I turned off east once more, leading me back into Kilmany, by some very rural road, with grass in the middle.

Now I knew that Jim Clark was born here, but have never approached from this direction before so was amazed to see a statue to the great man by the side of the road, I stopped to take a picture.

Back onto the A 92 for the short hop to the roundabout and the back road into St Michaels – Leuchars and home.

Distance 28.9 miles,

Time 2: 49:30

Average speed 10.25 mph Not bad considering the bad start (grass tracking).

Max speed 29.66

Ascent 997 Feet

Calories burned 1058 so I had a banana sandwich on my return.

Do you remember the days, when only eggs got laid,

And only the Rhinovirus was horny,

When only kangaroos jumped,

And only camels humped,

When getting stuffed, was a little taxidermy,

Now it has all become quite obscene,

With a heavy ugly screen,

Any movie, staring Arnold Schwarzenegger.

For decades now we have had a demographic disaster building (although our First Minister did help out when she put bed-blocking old folks out of the hospital into care homes, knowing full well they had Coronavirus.) Now the Chancellor of the Exchequer is having difficulty getting the sums to add up. Our Prime Minister want to raise taxes to pay for ‘Social Care’ for the elderly which has not gone down well in the country – and with local elections coming up, who could blame the MPs for getting a bit skittish, more so when one of the manifesto pledges was “We will not raise taxes, like that other lot”, Oh dear o’ dear, poor Boris.

Good government is all about choices, and what to spend money on. Well here is a starter for 10, where to find the money for the NHS, Schools, care for the elderly and much, much more.

Trident renewal: would £205bn be a price worth paying?

The cost has become more of an issue at a time of budget pressures, but MoD has been coy about giving an overall estimate. Still, £205 billion would go a long way to helping you out of your difficulties, Mr Johnston. But what about all the highly paid jobs that come with Trident? Who do you think looks after us in hospitals, schools and social care, Robots?

The government announced its commitment to an order of 138 F-35 aircraft, with 24 available for carrier duties by 2023. How much will it cost? The overall programme is the most expensive weapons system in military history. An estimated cost from 2015 put the price at £78m per jet, without engine or electronics. For everything included, the Lightning jets come in at a grand total of £190m. And that is before we factor in the cost of armaments.

And what will we do with all this hardware, put it on the new Elizabeth class aircraft carriers and let the Americans use it in the Pacific, to frighten the Chinese into surrendering their territorial waters? With about as much success as their little farce sending a gunboat into the Black Sea to scare off the Russians, who are minnows compared with China.

The two Elizabeth class aircraft carriers (only one commissioned the other already mothballed) cost billions to build and billions to maintain, mothball them both or put them on e-bay and claw back some of the cost to the UK treasury. No one knows what the final bill and running costs will be but I would think it would be enough to provide a very healthy budget for the NHS and social care for young and old alike. Bairns not bombs.

Yesterday we did not have enough mileage to reach Pontorson, today with 28.9 we have more than enough for the journey.

One thing I should mention, you will have to get used to long straight roads for mile after mile and those annoying markers every kilometre, laughing at you as the kilometres ever so slowly tick down.

So, with these extra miles in the bank today, why not a detour to Mont St-Michel, just up the river from Pontorson. If you get the opportunity to go – then go, but go early or late in the evening, for the tourists are heavy on the ground during the day. Sadly bicycles are no longer allowed to cycle out over the causeway, so you have to leave your bike at the free bike park near the Palace du Barrage, and either walk or take the shuttle bus. Oh, the cobbled streets are not cycle shoe friendly either. Give yourself plenty of time for this journey since you will be walking, a lot.

Stay safe.

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